Tallahassee
Falling Grace
-a South Dakota snowfall in Yankton
Raelea C Phillips Copyright © 2010. All rights reserved.
A story of footsteps go pitter patter
where massacre once took place
innocent blood sadly scattered
beneath a soil of immortal deface
but the spirits yield to falling grace.
The peaceful sight of eminent silence
from glazing white content display
sparkling flakes of tiny crystals
that slowly fall and gently lay
on a sad Dakota winter's day
Memories melt in land of buffalo
northern plains contend its past
but stories reign through songs of snow
until one voice is Lakota’s last
then who to reveal the unborn mask?
And so beneath a martyred ground
a passive season of wintry lace
ageless spirits leave vacant sounds
through a blanket of mercy, asylum face
from a sleepless sky of falling grace.
Oh peaceful sight of eminent silence
your glazing white content display
& sparkling flakes of tiny crystals
that slowly fall and gently lay
on a calm Dakota winters' day.
Lake Ella series
-the story of Nathan
Raelea C Phillips Copyright © 2010. All rights reserved.
The Heron As My Witness
Part 1, 4/19/1999 1:30pm
Little does my companion know
The naked image of his deceiving fire
Conviction upon I must bestow
To release and free this burning desire
But to continue deception my heart will tire
Seeking warmth from untamed child
Displayed heart begged for destined bruise
Confused mind his chastity beguiled
With simple pleasures that can’t be refused
But tormented the self for a battle to lose
Rhythmic pounding of shameless flesh
Temptation to words but never expressed
Unclaimed lips in passionate embrace
Then falter emotions through senseless sex
With mindless gestures vaguely confessed
“And I will be the one” piece
To a 3-D puzzle built in space
A piece adrift amongst Capricorn
Then encountered briefly around a lake
To a fearless heron that saw my face
To witness my sin of vulnerability
Trembling body screams with delight
The bird gives warning of fatality
The untimely escape of false reality
With parting sweet souls, surrender tonight.
Resurrection of Guidance
Heron As My Witness Part 2, 6/21/1999 6pm
Footsteps on a sidewalk around the lake
Hands embraced with contentment
Remembering encounters of a heron’s take
Passion and surrendered moment
Gazing stares through eyes of resentment
Blushing, conversing with a tender touch
Trading childhood tales sans regret
Comfort from one missed so much
A heron anticipating with every step
Kept thoughts of doubt until eyes had met
A bench awaiting a timeless memory
To discover a thought soon to find
Fulfilling heart where it was empty
For a smile the eyes had left behind
The heron’s guidance resurrected in mind
Delaying all words the eyes can see
A smile follows from a lasting stare
And the constant heron with a destiny
Stands and awaits observing the pair
While looking at one with obvious care
Witnessed a friendship beginning then
A mission complete the bird takes flight
While fearless lips connected again
Smiling eyes exclude star-crossed sight
Joining souls sweet surrender tonight.
Full Moon Instead
Heron as My Witness Part 3, 7/29/1999 10PM
Full moon, full moon intensely shining
summer scattered stars brightly smiling.
Sparkling dew on fields of bedded grass
surrounding a lake of glistening past.
No heron in sight to catch an evening’s meal
somewhere else loving hearts she can steal.
Dream Well
For N. 7/29/1999 10PM
A burning path through veins so deep
passions flowing making me weep.
Your excited eyes stare fierce into mine
conveying a message words cannot find.
Penetrating thoughts of erotic play
melting heat where our bodies had lay.
Two hearts at rest in sleep to dwell
spooning love motions of dreaming well.
Less The Dream
8/16/1999 1am in Pensacola without Nathan
Helpless
I fatigue too easily
draining my body of all its energy
pondering life
Senseless
time passing and racing against my thoughts
Meaningless
thoughts of the unexpected
no future – no dream
Effortless
are these thoughts as they whirl into ideas
to keep for a short while then…
Helpless
without the idea no dream can exist
no dream – no life
more thoughts to invade
Painless
without an idea
Then give me my pain
so I can dream again!
Love
For N. 8/19/1999
Love - Do not compel me!
Rather the beating of his heart
should compel me
I cannot let go
I yearn to lose all feelings
If I cannot
and I am still compelled to love him
then let it be his love that compels me
not my own.
That Precious Kiss
For N. 8/28/1999 Sat. 6am
A precious kiss
I presented to him
A reminder
of an existing bond
not forgotten
Nor lost were the butterfly wings
fluttering about
inside a cage
of empty hope
But in return
and more precious than mine
a kiss of pure faith
on a love so divine
wading out time
which has tempted destruction
But that precious kiss
created the circle
that can never be broken.
Star-crossed Rejection
Heron As My Witness Final Moments
Inspired song Deception 6/20/2000 5PM
A breed of rejection
Must feed on deception
A belief of ones passion
to be more than it is
In the beginning
Thoughts overriding
A heart that was climbing
fell quickly for his
A heron's lookout
Told stories of doubt
She sensed the wrong route
that both had taken
Then guided sad eyes
To a place in demise
Star-crossed reprise
short-lived once again
A full moon one time
No heron to find
To witness in mind
deception of this twosome
But this was a warning
Of misplaced joining
Left souls in mourning
_________________________end of series
Lust
Last Day of Summer
9/21/2001
A September morn
I see the sun drift
farther away
Its time for autumn
and I feel okay
Oh, the chickadees still come
one by one
two by two
chitter, chatter
dance
eat
and play
There is an unusual peace today
for my heart has surrendered
since the last seasonal change
Here, an unusual love scene
Two spirits gather one by one
perhaps a past unsung
creating together a love once lost
perhaps a past undone.
So it is autumn tomorrow
This last summer day
I reminisce of a time
when things weren’t okay
This winter will bring
a melody for me
but take away
the unusual love scene.
A Wednesday Morning
For M 9/26/2001
Wake, my sweet dove
and fly
For the day
awaits
your company
But do not forget first
to take
your coffee
Look to the kitchen
before you go
This Wednesday morning
the aroma of
French liquid
will awake
your senses
and warm
your tongue
And I hope you kiss
my cheek
Goodbye
Have a Beautiful Day!
Dream of Blue Sheep
For M 9/27/2001
Like a child
I fight my bedtime
squirming around
to not fall asleep
but conscience cant find
the Dream of Blue Sheep
Touch me
please
I'm a little girl
kiss my breasts
I'm a raging womyn
Fuck my pussy
like a prostitute of war
Make love to the body
of a little girl
Stare in my eyes
tears can't escape
They fled to secrete
and dampen the rage
hips in slow motion
like whales in the ocean
grinding & pulling
the girl still remains
Your penis swells
as you approach
my walls of honey
ready & soaked
tapping with fingers
and letting it out
we fall into ecstasy
together no doubt
Caress my face
and see the child
restless no more
she waits for your smile
So tell her the story
in whispering sleep
and how she will
Dream of Blue Sheep.
Goodbye
For M 9/27/2001
Our paths will cross again
For us my kindred friend.
Still Dreaming of You
For Nathan 5/4/2001 3AM
Interrupting my mind
and space
you stop for a while
and look at my face
For as you glance
you notice my trance
lost in this world
I hope not to
wake
But no interruption
of sleep can be
the fateless man
whom I cannot see
For your not there
you've left me somewhere
but I'm still looking
for you in my
dreams
To Smoke Again
reminiscing Nathan’s love 8/25/2001 2AM
Intriguing as it may be
like a south wind on the sea
smoke to set things free
following misguided sex
Forewarning of a failing tree
to fall on top of me
the fire burns without glee
from words of eloquence
I'm reminded of times with One
who left signs of doom
by inhaling & tasting one cigarette
this brings the thought of regret
Distant One still safe inside
if let out may still reside
I bow my head in shame
and he will not know the blame
He’s caught somewhere
in an Arizona town
alone to bear
his crying sounds
As the tears fall
within his grasp
I hope to catch him
before the ground
So I smoke
to reminisce
of one such time
I fell in bliss
But only to end
the cigarette
I watch the filter
burn to a crisp.
Stumbled Love
Inspired by Phil M. 2/19/1999
Restless thoughts
The beasts encountered
Vacant heartbeat
Hath love be stumbled
Grieving eyes
Of desperation
To forget desire
In all creation
Swirling patterns
Of broken dreams
Where they're heard
In distant screams
Of stumbled love
falling
falling
To a hole of messages
left unsaid
to survivors above
For they are unknown
to stumbled love.
Still Waiting
Inspired by Phil M. 2/19/1999
Brisk fire of rage
Tormenting souls of a relentless evilness
Provoking one’s thoughts
to torture one’s selflessness
to pain the mind to complete nothingness
Darkness filling a space
for only one love.
Afternoon Delight
For Robbie Rob 8 & 9/2000, 7/2005
A voice so tender and kind
soft brown eyes I see in mind
and a smile seeming sincere
but thoughts get lost, never to find
My visit for just this sensual sight
for him, a passionate afternoon delight
intentional bodies are shared
but attentiveness is the constant fight
Lost with words I speak too much
to ease his limp suspension
taking the blame for this touch
or lack of any to mention
Still confused, the time to go
sensing anxious anticipation
for me to leave and never know
the level of his humiliation
That voice so tender and kind
soft brown eyes I saw in mind
a smile that seemed sincere
reflections lost in afternoon delight.
Playtime
3/18/2000
Fallen to fantasy
Next door
A child plays
Stories once told
Dirty hands escaped
A tale forgotten
Unjustly forgiven
But the memory stayed
Her innocence lost
Next door
Child’s play
Tempting Sex
3/18/2000
Deceiving
Demeaning
Making light
Of what’s believing
Sugar-coating
the obvious
Underlying
syrup grieving
If all was done
Then all was won
By the hopeful one
And left me bleeding
a love not forgotten.
_________________________________
Focus series
A tit for a tat
a green & blue cat
went totally splat
under a tire
and it has gone flat
for just doing that
to a colorful cat
No tit for a tat.
−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−
Finer than wine
and a traveling vine
the hidden line
of a poet's rhyme.
−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−
Do not touch thy foot
Thy foot
contains thy leg
Thy leg
contains thy pelvis
Thy pelvis
contains thy vagina
Thy Vagina…
... and that it is!
−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−-
You are being an asshole
Fishing from a pond
You call your own
And pulling them out
Without any doubt
To throw them back
Then sputter about.
Focus
She enters a world
without love
the world
in a glove
holding
the hand
of a dream.
Part 2
9/27/2001
Two silver cats
Surround my finger
One sits up
And one just lingers
Both with eyes
Of lost little tigers
Two silver cats
Surround my ring finger
------------------------------------------
A tire blown out
Makes a terrible sound
Like an old man gargling
His Listerine liquid
Louder and louder
The rig gets closer
Outside my window
An I-10 disaster!
--------------------------------------------
*Oh, I have not showered today
The smell
of my pussy
has found
my face
Like honey and chocolate
it lingers to play
I cannot stop
to wash it
away!
A Dried-up Lake
9/27/2001
I think I'll go to the park today
It's the one with a wooden walkway
to overlook
a dried-up lake
Lake Jackson is its name
The evil sinkholes drained
the water
and all its life away
and under
and out
and to the Gulf
They say it happens every 25 years
but sadness
a lake without tears
I think I'll go to the park today
The one with a wooden walkway
that overlooks
A Dried-up Lake.
_________________________end of series
Raining A Creative Peace
10pm in an empty house 4/18/2002
R
a
i
n
i
n
g
a creative peace
To surround
a lost soul
To drench
her fear of loneliness
To soak
her broken mind
To drown
her empty heart
And wash her pain with tears
The salt
To cleanse and sign away
A past left in the past
Raining
a creative peace.
Marching Chickadees
Rick, me & the chickadees off Raymond Diehl Road
2/15/2001 & 3/2/2001
And so it goes and says
Of one leaf falling
gently
onto his leg
gracefully
and a peaceful death it was
Then the chickadees come
one by one
hungry for seeds
she left to feed
to await their songs
of curious charm
Consider her Center
5/1/2001
An observant observation
For you to consider
Would guide you somewhere
into her center
A spiritual world
Enfolding a girl
Whose grace and sound
propel within her
But ignoring ignorance
Of this endeavor
Will be your loss
to know the composer
With endless depth
Escaping each breath
Her song will resonate
a spirit forever
Men
5/1/2001
Oh fuck –
I don't want another
to find their way with me
as a brother
Maybe for sex
maybe for nothing
Here I go again
analyzing another
But I like to know
what makes them tick
'cause I don't want
just someone's dick
Oh I can explore
a toy at the store
or sleep with a woman
who thinks with her head!
A Mind's Companion
6/2001
After the mind
has been unloaded
truck for a while
avoid the exploded
for now you are empty
and space can be tricky
your wanting it back
will leave you corroded.
Most hold guilt
for their freedom
without the fear
they feel alone
keeping the hurt
secure in their dirt
the pain within;
a mind's companion.
April
6/2001
In the beautiful spring of April
Mamma & Rick were born
their love that blooms
like gifts of flowers
from hearts’ so soft
as pedals in morn.
Mania
A Wednesday morning 8/8/2001
I imagine
Outside myself
Naked
Upon the air
Adrift
In manic motion
Twisting and turning
My body
Won’t float
Limbs are pulling
In every direction
Like dancing to
Melodic vibrations
No pain
But racing
My brain
Cannot stop
Oh – I yearn for peace but thoughts embracing a continuous trot through endless fields of energy that yield to nothing happy but ah to sleep that I may rest someplace deep where floating is option and twisting motion will cease and every melody can find its source crawl back to hide the trotting horse
then all I've sensed will numb itself again I may be inside myself.
Butter & Crackers
Part 1, 9/28/2001 2:30pm
Like chewing
the side
of a mountain
and cold moss
clinging
with each bite
Grandma got me hooked
ranges ago
a poor-man’s
delight
Broken
Part 2, 9/28/2001 2:30pm
I dropped the crackers
on the floor
still wrapped
were broken
but I wanted more
I sensed the pain
as I ate
torn corners
crackers heard crying
and flour
kept bleeding
as limbs
tastefully died
chewed up inside
my mouth a consumption whore!
Silence
10/2001
In a field of dead grass
Brown consumes the worlds color
No spirits to dwell this space
In a land of absent life
Silence echoes the world’s voice
And loneliness accompanies fate
Pollution
4/30/2000
Missing are the treetops of man
Between mountains absent of song
Where life has silenced the snowcaps
And empty is the meaning of the forest
Missing are the treetops of the forest
Between mountains absent of snowcaps
Where man has silenced the song
And empty is the meaning of life.
Conspiring Birds Sing
To Mom & Dad Mothers Day and Fathers Day
5/14/2000 & 6/28/2000
Conspiring birds sing
Oh the inspiration they bring
Ah, but though
The songs escape them
Pressing further
Into a breeze of oblivion
Flowing through the leaves
Of unborn trees
Food for earth’s soil
Where roots no longer spoil
And let the rains toil
Down with the liquid which gives life
Up with the blossom that holds life
Then down with the autumn leaves to end life
But only to feed
Beneath
Encouraging the seed
Above
And continuing
Conspiring birds sing
Bringing life
To everything!
Make Believe
5/11 & 5/14/2000
Make believe
You’re on board a ship of angels
That fly
Just for the feel of the wind
Racing between each feather
And each cloud flown through
Becoming enlightened
Though a storm may brew
Fly anyway
Despite dismay
For the intensity
Of freedom
And passion
That is what I feel when I sing to you!
A God And A Monster
From the film God's & Monsters 9/11/2000
Oh to tell the tale
A poetic man of creation
This life was James Whale
Then left with demise
His death of surprise
The god's gay impression
The monster could not fail
A Place To Belong
9/19/2000
The weeping willow dreams
Of a nightingale’s song
For contentment in finding
A place to belong
A tune to surround her
Like a sea to her shore
And breathe the sweet sound of earth
in a distant folklore
Once this is found
She would ask for no more
Illogical Nonsense
9/19/2000
In telling a tale of interest
You must first neglect
Both logic
and sense
For boring are those
Which consume the mind
Of everyday thought
of scheduled time
So eradicate logic
And sense be forgotten
The tale must confer
to passion and freedom!
Surrounded By Love
6/23/1998
Soft and sweet with the bluest of eyes
looking up at me for a big surprise.
She waits patiently as I dry myself
so to spread her scent where it is not
just a shower then step out of the tub
I’m to sit with a towel she has taught.
So happy and humming with such content
she presses her paws gently around
expecting a petting on her sweet head
her scent all over now can be found.
Then a plea from my other love
“Meow, meow hear me” she sends above.
Her stripes so defined
her eyes so green
big and bright with excitement
her presence must be seen.
Checking the tub for water left over
her nose scopes up and down
noticing me and her sister’s content
she pounces right over not making a sound.
My little Loves are my perfumed scent
that protects me once again
so when I go out and into the world
their love surrounds me from beginning to end.
A Lovely Little Life
12/10/1998 5:40am
A lovely little life came into mine
more precious than gold or a gem to find
Her eyes so soft
with innocence and grace
her symmetrical stripes
that surround a sweet face
In northern Alabama
found a kitten small and meek
crying for a rescue mission
due to hunger and feeling weak
Now a real home with
three sisters to bear
warmth and safety surround her
a new life to share
her hugs and kisses
she freely hands out
after frolicking and dancing
and prancing about
So chipper and playful
and bouncing around
hiding beneath blankets
not making a sound
With silent surrender
she then offers a hum
tender paws press gently
to express appreciation
What did I do to deserve such a blessing?
That which entered my world and gives me life’s lesson
By teaching me love
unconditional form
this lovely little life
which gratefully was born!
Big Band Night
3/24/1999 9:45pm
Gazing in to each others eyes
Elderly couples reminiscing
The sound of big band tunes
Melodies they had been missing
The dance floor covered with memories
Excited feet fluttering about
Swinging, fox-trotting, whirling turns
Conversing with laughter, an occasional shout
Smiling lips muttering lyrics
To a favorite Sinatra tune
Luck Be A Lady, A Summer Wind
My Way and Fly Me To the Moon.
Sentimental Journey they take here
Creating this moment a new memory for some
Politely asking another to dance
Making song requests one by one.
Two then three hours and fatigue sets in
Humble legs ready to leave
Content with the stroll down memory lane
Wishing that dawn had no reprieve
Another Wednesday of Big Band Night
Everyone slowly shuffles away
But next week they will be back
At Julie’s – Big Band is here to stay.
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