I Am Here
© Raelea C Phillips 2010. All rights reserved.

I am here
I am so afraid
I don’t know who I am
Part of me has changed
A mirror stands
Reflection’s not the same
I wish it wasn’t me

I am here
I don’t want to be ashamed
I want to show you who I am
The woman inside me
is fighting this thing
with sisters hand in hand
I am here to stay

I am here to fight
I want to live this life
I’m not gonna stop
I am gonna go on
There’s a battle to fight
to live this life
Don’t ever give up
You got to use this time
to keep on moving on
You are not alone

So come take this walk with me
And wear your pink with pride
We are on our way
Join us in this fight

I am here
Please don’t turn away
Take a look at who I am
I am still me

We’re here to fight
We’ gotta live this life
We can’t stop
We have gotta go on
There’s a battle to fight
to live this life
Don’t you ever give up
You’ve gotta use this time
to keep on moving on
And you are not alone

You are here
I will not turn away
cuz I know who you are
And I love you just the same.


In The Stars
© Raelea C Phillips 2010. All rights reserved.

I love you more than the moon
I love you more than a constellation
Every meteor that races above the night sky
A message to those we love who learned to fly

I love you more than the sun
I love you more than clouds in formation
Every raindrop that falls into my face
Carries a message from you somewhere in the universe

If I could reach that far I’d hold on to you in the stars
Nothing, nothing will change my heart

I love you more than a rainbow
And I love you more than you could possibly know
Every time I see the stars in the sky
I know you look down and hold me while I cry

If you could reach this far you would lift me up to the stars
Oh nothing, nothing can change your heart
If I could reach that far I’d hold on to you in the stars
Oh nothing, nothing can change my heart

I see a crow in mourning and she takes up flight
She carries the soul of one who has died

I love you more than the wind
And I love you more than tree branches dancing
Every flower that opens with new life
A smile from you so I won’t forget to laugh

If I could reach that far, I’d hold on to you in the stars
Nothing, I said nothing will change my heart
Someday I’ll fly that far and we’ll meet at the moon and stars
Nothing, nothing can change your heart...Nothing will change my heart.


Where You Last Stood
© Raelea C Phillips 2010. All rights reserved.

Sun lit room; rays slide down the kitchen floor
I just got home; standing in my front door
Where you last stood whispering lonely tears
I will conjure up your love and daydream of you here

Oh it felt so calm when we were lost in a moment
The world turns off when I go back to that moment again

I won’t move but I sit down in your space
Take off my shoes hug my knees and bury my face
I think hard opening a recent file
Oh memory I’m in your warehouse
Let me stay for a little while

Oh it felt so calm when we were lost in a moment
The world turns off when I go back to that moment...

Forget this file; burn the whole thing down
I’m better of without, I’m better off without…

Oh it felt so calm when we were lost in our moment
The world turned off but I can’t go back to that moment again

A shadowed room; echo of a closing door
Where you last stood but I can’t see you anymore.


Detached
© Raelea C Phillips 2010. All rights reserved.

I left a past of old lovers
I go to sleep avoiding the loneliness
But if you’re there I’ll pretend I’m awake
and you may tempt me from this hiding place

Reoccurring dream, I want your embrace
I am lost in a blood rushing kiss
One moment, a release, the smallest taste
of what it felt like once
Anymore would feel like

I am under the sand of a dark hourglass
while every grain is falling fast

I really tried with so many lovers
But every time I’d steal the home plate
It would break like a sliding glass door
when I’d go running and falling in love

I am broken but I can be mended
Many times I have been stranded
So I detached, I rather be secluded
I don’t want to be with anyone...

I rather be under the sand, the sand, the sand
in a dark hourglass while every grain is falling...

To be the flower in your bedroom vase
I’ll gladly stay for a little bit
just until the pedals have wilted
Anymore would feel like...
I am under the sand of a dark hourglass
while every grain is falling fast.


Waiting
By Raelea C Phillips & Tracy Phillips
© Raelea C Phillips 2010. All rights reserved.

Every time I look outside
my window pane fogs up and hides
Your face was on the other side
but it was only in my mind

I’m waiting here for you
I’m waiting here for you
(I’m waiting I’m waiting for you)
I’m waiting here for you
I’m waiting here for you
(I’m waiting I’m waiting for you)

I look outside and the sky is gray
but memories of you color my day
As raindrops fall down on my face
I miss you since you’ve gone away

But I’m waiting here for you
I’m waiting here for you
(I’m waiting I’m waiting for you)
I’m waiting here for you
I’m waiting here for you
(I’m waiting I’m waiting for you)

I walked away from the foggy window pane
And you got lost inside my mind as it went blank
Now I’m trying to bring back just your face
but you’re fading away

I’m still waiting for you
I’m waiting here, I’m waiting I’m waiting
(I’m waiting I’m waiting for you)
I’m still waiting for you
I’m waiting here, I’m waiting I’m waiting
(I’m waiting I’m waiting for you)

Every time I look outside my window
(I’m waiting I’m waiting for you)
Every time I look outside my window
I’m waiting here for you....
(I’m waiting I’m waiting for you)

I’m waiting here for you
I’m waiting here
but you’re fading you’re fading away.


Caged
© Raelea C Phillips 2010. All rights reserved.

I can’t get out of the house; I’m caged in this mess
I sleep all day but can’t get any rest since you left
I hide in the dark with a candle lit
under the smoke of an incense stick
to mask the cigarette and the drunken state I’m in...

I wish you’d come back and take me out of this cage

I can’t write, I can’t eat, I can’t play, I can’t sing,
I can’t do anything, can’t get myself to even masturbate
I’m chokin’ down the bottle you left; I’m swimming around
but drownin’ to death in this hell you left me in
This hell you left me in…

But I wish you’d come back and take me out of this cage
Oh I wish you’d come back and take me out of this…

Haven’t felt the sun on my face or breathe the outside air
and I don’t even know what day it is…

I wish you’d come back and take me out of this cage
Oh I wish you’d come back and take me out of this...

I can’t get out of the house; I’m caged in this mess
I sleep all day but can’t get any rest
since you left.


Empty
© Raelea C Phillips 2010. All rights reserved.

It's 5 AM, I just got home
another morning driving my car on empty
You're not here
A silent house, a lonely bed
echoes of the words we said so empty
fill the air
With your picture sitting there
I can see your eyes staring at me
Oh I wish it was real
Memories of the radio on
you & me always singing along & riding
with my hands at the wheel

It's all that I have to remind me
Like the times we'd drive around this crazy city
Now that you're gone I feel empty
So I drive around with the memory

I lost the time I can’t go home
I’m cold and lonely so I parked out on the street
& I stare at the wheel
I miss you close to keep me warm
since you're gone my car is halfway empty
Oh I wish you were here

It's all that I have to remind me
Like the times we'd drive around this crazy city
Now that you're gone I feel empty
So I drive around with the memory
I hope you remember what I still remember
If you ever feel alone think of things we've done
I hope you can see when you're running on empty
The memories are not gone

It's all that I have to remind me
Like the times we'd drive around this crazy city
Now that you're gone I feel empty
So I drive around with the memory

It's 5am, I just got home
another morning driving my car alone.


Florida Rain
© Raelea C Phillips 2010. All rights reserved.

I woke one morning and the sky was falling
The tears started comin' cuz I knew you had to leave
You were singing along with the radio playing
As we packed the van I could hardly breathe
Then you came on over and held me tight
Looked in my eyes and said you’d always remember me
Well the sky was crying and I felt like dying

So I washed the pain in the Florida Rain
I let if flow and I left him go to find his own life
Now maybe I'll find mine

A man had to choose to say goodbye
and take the life of his loyal ol' best friend
She was fifteen years and barely walking
Well his dog was a dying and a comin' to an end
So he laid her down in the seat of his jeep
They got to the vet and she didn't feel a thing
As she closed her eyes the man was crying

Then he washed his pain in the Florida Rain
He let it flow and let her go to find a peaceful life
He said, "I hope that I'll find mine."

A woman held on to her husband's hand
The cancer had taken his one last breath of time
Standing by him their two girls
He smiled at them as he left this world behind
After saying their last goodbye they...

Washed their pain in the Florida Rain
Let it flow and let him go to find his next life
You can wash your pain in the Florida Rain
Let it flow and let it all go with time
then you will find the meaning of this life.


A Different Kind
© Raelea C Phillips 2010. All rights reserved.

Like a creek of a river that flows in its own motion
You put a message in a bottle to stay out on the ocean
You’re a different kind

Like a gentle northern breeze on a southern summer day
You’re the snowflake in the spring that would not melt away
A different kind

Like a rain drop from the sky in a desert without clouds
You’re the silence in between the chaos of a crowd
A different kind
Like a smile in a picture constant without will
You're the moment of contentment when time is standing still
You’re a different kind

You’re a different kind of person; an original soul
You have a different concept in an ordinary world
On a road not taken you don’t follow the norm
Don’t change for anyone just stay the way you are

Like a creek of a river that flows in its own motion
You wrote a message in a bottle that stays out on the ocean
You’re a different kind

You’re a different kind of person; an original soul
You have a different concept in an ordinary world
On a road not taken you don’t follow the norm
Don’t change for anyone; just stay the way you are
Just stay the way you are.


It's Going To Be Okay
© Raelea C Phillips 2010. All rights reserved.

You shared a story with me
You didn’t show me the scars but I see it in your face
A secret I’ll take to the grave, but it kills me to know
that someone one could be so cruel to somebody else

You never told anyone before
You’ve been hiding the pain
but I hear it now in your voice as you say
“The nightmares won’t go away”
After all of these years you almost see what happened
but then you awake

Rockabye baby on the tree top
If the bough breaks I won’t let you fall
Oh my friend it’s gonna be okay...

You let me inside
I want you to know how honored I feel
to be a part of your life
I hope you understand
I’ll always be here for you my friend
You shared yourself with me
You didn’t show me the scars
but I see it in your face and I hear it in your voice
Your secret I’ll take to the grave, I promise you, my friend
But it kills me to know that someone one could be so cruel
Oh my friend it’s gonna be okay
Oh my friend it’s gonna be okay
Oh my friend it’s gonna be okay.


Blue Eyes
© Raelea C Phillips 2010. All rights reserved.

Blue eyes since you’ve come
you changed the lives of everyone
you touched and smiled upon
Nothing will be the same

Blue eyes once upon a time
Two people collectively had a dream
Sow a seed of a Rowan tree
cultivating an autumn bloom
Look in the water’s reflection that beautiful flower is you

Blue eyes since you’ve come you changed the lives of everyone
you touched and smiled upon nothing will be the same
Blue eyes since you’ve come nothing else matters when you’re around
with your touch and smiling face my world has ever changed

Blue eyes I’m here for you
when everyday brings something new
You may not know right now what mysteries are in brew
But on a road less traveled by
the answer will always be in you

I want you to know how special you are
You were born under a full moon
You are the nightlight in my dark room

Blue eyes I made a chart for you
You came in the twilight of a Gemini moon
Rising air of Gemini in the sign of a Scorpio sun
A road adorned and graced by the womyn you will become…
...Blue eyes because you came the world is a better place.


Tristan's Lullaby
© Raelea C Phillips 2010. All rights reserved.

It was winter time but the sun was shining Tristan
Sister’s smiling eyes, lying in the arms of Rowan
He sings lullabies of stars up in the sky a twinklin’
Pisces on the rise Virgo moon disguised by morn’

Aquarius, you are a musical warming up winter skies
now fly your way home

My little nephew climb up that oak tree
Look out at the world, love all that you see
Don’t be afraid to follow yourself
For you will not be like anyone else
Hear your drum beat proudly beating

It was summer time and the clouds were raining Tristan
Rhythmic lullabies, climbing little boy, come down

Aquarius, you are a musical cooling our summer skies
now fly your way home

My little nephew swim out in the sea
Go out in the world love who you will be
Don’t be afraid to follow yourself
For you will not be like everyone else
Hear your drum beat softly whispering

It is winter time but the sun is shining Tristan
He sings lullabies; he dances all around

Aquarius, you are a musical warming our winter skies
fearless bird you fly and sing your way home

Tristan, you are a musical ending so take a bow
Your lullaby is home.


Rowan's Song
© Raelea C Phillips 2010. All rights reserved.

Rowan tree, your fragile roots will spawn
The sun will shine on you
The ground will keep you warm
Above the soil awaits an emerging dawn
The crescent moon will carry you
into a mother’s loving arms

Rowan tree, you may have to stand alone
In times when no one’s there
Your strength will keep you up
Don’t be afraid
when your branches fall from storm
The crescent moon will carry you
into a father’s loving arms

Rowan Marie, the moment you are born
The earth will change on an autumn day
early one November morn
You will throw your arms out wide
Your leaves will fill our world
An extraordinary life
Rowan you amazing girl

My little niece we haven’t met yet
but you already mean so much to me
You’re my sister’s girl so I already know
what a super wonder woman you will be

Rowan Marie, the moment you are born
The earth will change on an autumn day
early one November morn
You will throw your arms out wide
Your leaves will fill our world
An extraordinary life
Rowan you amazing girl
Little baby girl
We’re waiting here for you…


In The Sky
© Raelea C Phillips 2010. All rights reserved.

Oh the moon is full tonight
Another month gone by again
It’s a night light in the sky
I wonder what’s out there far away
I wish I may and might have you lying here beside me
We can stare up in the sky just above the pines trees

I don’t need the sun to warm me up
I’m blanketed with stars
The moon is shining bright to remind me
just how small we are

I wish I may and might have you lying here beside me
We can stare up in the sky just above the pines trees
Counting every constellation our fingers can outline them
We can feel the earth’s vibrations while the sun is still sleeping

Oh I know you can’t be far away
Sagittarius come out and play
I’m calling out your name...

Oh the moon is full tonight
Another month gone by again
Every evening if you think of me
I hope you look up in the sky
I’ll be looking up in the sky

I wish I may and might have you lying here beside me
We can stare up in the sky just above the pines trees
Counting every constellation our fingers can outline them
We can feel the earth’s vibrations while the sun is still sleeping.